Wednesday, June 1, 2011


Strawberry Shortcake is on a date with Ken...and just when I thought he and Barbie were going to work through their issues.

And there is NO denying they are just friends...look at the lipstick all over his smug face. It's just terrible. I will now refer to Strawberry Shortcake as...Strawberry Sloozie:)

Friday, May 27, 2011

This one is for LaShawn...

It would appear that Strawberry Shortcake is having a rough night. Or morning. She's naked. She is hovering over a toilet. And she forgot to flush. This is not good for her "sweet" wholesome image.

I am having trouble typing because this one just makes me laugh. Why, Mattel, did you make a Barbie toilet that actually makes flushing sounds and clicks from dirty to clean? And why, dear daughter, do you have it sitting on the dirty side???

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Would you like paper or plastic?

I am confused. Is Barbie for sale? Is she for rent (what?? honest question...look how short the dress is:) Is she applying for a cashier job the old fashioned way? Or is the economy finally effecting our favorite icon and she is just trying to earn a few groceries?

We may never know...

***Thank you Robin from good 'ol Midland, Texas for the guest photo:) Please let us know if Barbie steals anything...

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Family holiday

It appears that the entire family is on Europe. Because I know that isn't legal in this country.

And who is Ken talking to on that fancy headset? Maybe he is telcommuting to work? You know that modeling career is demanding.

Monday, May 23, 2011

A new take on Thanksgiving...

My husband's fantasies have come true. Thanksgiving will now be celebrated naked. In stilettos.

Those are killer shoes though...:)

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

It's groovy...

Burn baby burn! Disco Inferno!! Burn baby burn! Disco Inferno is what came to mind with this scene. Barbie has some wicked glasses and very little clothing. I'm not sure how the little people fit in the picture but something about the blue light in the backdrop just screams '70's:)

Or maybe it's just a drunk librarian who channeled Pink Floyd for story time.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

OH. Dear.

There is a story there. We just don't know what it is:).

What we do know...somewhere there is a one legged Barbie that is quite possibly naked. Whatever happened was MESSY. grandpa was really weirded out when he got home and found this scene in the garage. Yes...garage. No...we don't know why.

Maybe we don't want to know.

Friday, March 4, 2011

Cleanup time...

I asked the daughter to clean her room and she did...and I can't help but notice...

Why is it that whenever there is a half naked Barbie around the Rosie Barbie is always nearby? Even in the toy's almost creepy:)

Thursday, February 24, 2011

S. V. U.

Quick! Somebody call Stabler and Benson...we have a crime scene!!!

We may never know the real story...did Ken finally come out and Barbie just couldn't handle the humiliation?? Was Barbie spending too much on the wedding so Ken opted for insurance money (come on...she has to be worth MILLIONS:). Maybe Barbie is just auditioning for a chance to perform with David Blaine?!

What we do know is that silicone doesn't REALLY float. Sorry...that was bad...but it was TOO easy:)

**Thank you to Shyanne for the FABULOUS guest photo...I hope that your Barbie survives this tragic event...:)

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

The 80's are BACK :)

I guess this is what happens when you save all of your Barbie's and Barbie furniture for your daughter. I was SO excited to give it to her (and NOT just because it meant she had to give up the Dora house to get it:).

Skipper gor lucky and found the Sony walkman, the VHS tape recorder, and the 1987 cordless telephone and she is relaxing on the couch with all of them.

P.S. Bump, bump, bump it up...keep that bump it spirit up:) THAT was for K:)

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Dorothy strikes again...

Don't you hate when this happens?! You're just sitting around in your best shoes and jewelry...your hair all fixed. You're thinking about maybe getting dressed...but maybe not...because's your party and you can do what you want...and then BAM. The freaking little people strike again. They drop their house on you and suddenly you're trapped...and you KNOW what's going to happen to your favorite shoes. It's a nightmare...

****Thank you to Miss Raw Banana for the fabulous guest post!! I apoligize for getting behind...sometimes the daughter gets more interested in lego's!!!

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Calling all the single ladies!!!

This man is single. You have prayed for the WHOLE package and now he has been a basket. What more can you ask for?!?!?

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Advertisement for MADD?

Looks like Cinderella has been drinking and driving again and Barbie didn't fare as well as the Care Bears. Sad, sad, sad...we may have to revoke her license. For some reason she is the only one who ever drives...

It IS ironic?

I encountered this scene in the daughter's room this afternoon. Cinderella and her pal are present...and this time they invited their bff with no legs, Ariel.
Rosie got another invite somehow and she decided to come without clothes which might be a better option if she hit the mystic tan booth.
The blonde is a new addition to the crew. Not sure who she is but I am quite sure she needs a bra.

The irony of this photo is that the daughter watched me take it. She was very proud that I was taking a picture and wanted to point out what she was most proud of in this scene. You see...she is not phased by the lack of clothing or exposed breasts or even the fact that she has a fish out of water in the Barbie living room. She is MOST proud that the picnic basket is in the chair and they are having a picnic. Yep. I can just hear the song, "That's the way the barbie girls have their piiiiiiiic-nic."

Sunday, January 30, 2011


I'm not sure if she is doing yoga but we are going to go with that...mainly because I don't want to go there:). I went to clean the daughter's room to find the missing ipod and stumbled across this gem. When did they make Barbie's so flexible?!?

I did dress all of the Barbie dolls today...all the nakedness was driving me a little crazy:)

Good little mommy:)

She has the right idea. Babies should be laying on the furniture and not the floor. Maybe infants shouldn't be laying next to turtles which are known to have salmonella...but...hey. I like that she thought to have an extra blanket but I am unsure as to why she felt the baby needed to lay on a refrigerator shelf...but again...this is progress:)

Don't you love the baby's feet hanging out?! :)

Sunday, January 23, 2011

No words...

This picture is so bad that I have nothing witty to add...:)

I will say that it was nice of Strawberry Shortcake to join this party...glad we don't leave people out:)

Thursday, January 20, 2011


I'm not sure but I can only guess that this is the group shot from the orgy. I had NO idea that orgy's were a good excuse for a group photo but hey...I will pass it along to my photog friends:)
This picture was literally taken the morning after the other photo. I have no idea why Shay felt the need to prop them all up for a naked height line but...
Reminds me of what they use to call our drill team...prepare yourself..."whore core." This gives us a visual I guess...:)

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

PARTY!!! Clothing optional...

My, my, my. This is new. I'm not sure which is more upsetting...the fact that there is a massive orgy going on in my daughters bed or the fact that they invited Diego. Or maybe it is how pasty white the Rosie doll is naked.

I also have to say that even though the purple skirt did nothing for Ken's skin tone...I wish he'd have left it on for this party. EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWwww...

Thursday, January 13, 2011

The housekeeper did it...

This one can't be blamed on the daughter. The housekeeper came today and while I was searching for something that she misplaced...this is what I found.

I was REALLY concerned for Ken when I found him with the skirt around his ankles wearing a wet suit. Now I realize I had jumped the gun. Wearing a little, purple, fairy skirt around your ankles with a wetsuit on had NOTHING on him wearing a little, purple, fairy skirt around his waist...with nothing on underneath. Purple is NOT his color. I am disturbed.

And quite frankly I am beginning to wonder about Cinderella and her brunette pal. I always seem to find them together in somewhat...*ahem*...compromising positions. Might explain the fairy godmother. HAHAHAHA...okay...that was bad.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Road Rage

The first picture I took did not do the scene justice. Cinderella is driving around with her girlfriend and they have stopped in the town of strange little characters and picked up a red power ranger, a blue care bear (who is wearing a diaper that you can't see), and a really creepy flower that hovers overhead like a cloud. Then...I backed up and saw the BIG picture....

Cinderella is DRUNK and she is PLOWING OVER 6 little innocent care bears while the little blue one in her brunette friend's lap eggs her on. Tragic.

Monday, January 10, 2011

My first guest photo:)

Barbie has apparantly started her own brothel. I think the little blue elephants and cute little snowmen may scare off prospective clients though.

Be careful men. I have a feeling there is a filthy madaam doll somewhere with a little black book full of names. I just KNOW Woody is in it...he was always a little too smooth with Bo Peep. And helloooooo....his name is WOODY. You just have to wonder if his pal Buzz is in there too...

Sunday, January 9, 2011

Thankfully her eyes don't glow...

Here we find Barbie auditioning for The Exorcist remake. She is a shoo-in for the role formerly played by Linda Blair.

Sadly my daughter didn't find this situation very frightening. I did. I've SEEN the movie.
Still can't stand to hear a ticking clock.

Tomorrow we will have a guest post...I had my first picture sent in by a regular reader. She may be my only regular reader but I am proud to have her:)

Friday, January 7, 2011

Hey...she cleaned her room herself...

Where do we even start?

Ken, Ken, Ken. People have been questioning your sexual preference ever since Barbie dumped you. This isn't helping.

You are topless...on top of a basket of naked Barbie's...and yet we find you not just wearing a skirt...but wearing it at your ankles. With your hands in the air spread eagle while wearing a wet suit. We no longer have questions...we feel they have been answered.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Who invited THEM?

Upon first glance...this scene seems innocent. Barbie is having a little get together with her pals and their pooches. Then you notice that the 2 ladies on the far right are completely nude. Not topless...not scantily clad...just naked. And the dogs are all staring. Ken is wishing he made this dinner party.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Apparantly inviting Rosie was not a good plan. I came back later in the evening to find this scene. Cinderella is missing and her blonde friend seems to have been laid out while Rosie just sits there smiling. Scare bear.
Who invited Rosie O'Donnell to the dinner party? I doubt very seriously Cinderella wanted to hang out.

So...yes...I bought my child the Rosie doll. She was on sale at Goodwill for $1.50. Don't judge me.